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“What’s in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell just as sweet” – William Shakespeare Romeo and Juliet

What’s your name? This question used to fill me with dread, that’s because in the 1980’s, in Scotland, my name stuck out like a sore thumb. In a time where I could count multiple Alisons, Sarahs and Fionas in my year, my name was the only one in the whole school. I hated it. Often I was the first person of that name that people had met, this meant I always had to repeat it. At primary school, I was painfully shy and I blushed at the drop of a hat. So it drew attention when I didn’t want it. The conversation would go like this:

“What’s your name?”

Rowena

“What?”

Rowena

“Davina?”

Rowena

“Robina?”

Rowena

“Ribena”

Rowena

“Sounds like Ribena hahaha!”

Cue eternal teasing for sounding like a popular drink at the time. And did you get bored reading that bit? Yup, I can tell you it got really tiresome.

When I came to be a mum myself, I took the naming of my child so seriously, I didn’t want to pick something too popular but at the same time, something a bit different. I imagine most parents do the same, lovingly selecting names that may perhaps bestow some of the characteristics of that name.

I am gen X but I see a common trend in my children’s generation take ownership of their names in a way that we haven’t before. They come home from school and say that X is now called Y. I have asked/said “oh you mean a nickname?”. No that is their name now. They have picked it themself. Sometimes it is gender based decision, sometimes it’s not.

Choosing your own name can be empowering and truly help make you feel comfortable in your own skin. Your new name better fits your personality. My job as a celebrant is to help celebrate this decision, naming ceremonies are for everyone! Babies, trans, divorcees and anyone making a permanent change to their name. They can be as simple or as elaborate as you want, a full on party or maybe just a few moments during a birthday party or other family gathering. You can use the opportunity to put to rest your former name or deadname and help your family and friends, to accept and adapt to the change. It is a joyful part of my job and I am honoured to be able to do that.